Short Novels, Novellas, Screenplays, Film
Scripts,
Love Poems, Love Letters, Gothic Poems.
Official
Blog for Chris Lindsay
CELEBRITIES
HAVE READ MY BOOKS! June 2008; I work at Chapters in Kamloops,
BC. My book, Mysterious
Love Poems and Love Letters is now
in stock. Once in a blue moon a celebrity
comes into our store. In March I sold a copy
of my book to Ian Ashbury, the lead singer
of The Cult! On June 17th I gave a free copy
to James Callis who plays Gaius Baltar on
Battlestar Galactica.
MIGRAINE
HEADACHES August 28, 2007; For the last several
years I have suffered from migraine headaches.
In the summer of 2005 I had to go to the hospital
three times and be hooked up to an IV to stop
the pain.
There are many foods that trigger headaches.
My triggers are red wine, chocolate, raisins,
peanuts, peanut butter, almonds, raspberries,
and cranberries. Take a look at the ingredients
included in the bread you eat. Many breads
include raisin paste to increase the flavour.
Here are some natural ways to reduce your
headache: Drink one cup of apple juice mixed
with two tablespoons of apple cider vinegar.
It must be organic from a health food store,
not the pasteurized brand at grocery stores.
Make sure you take mouthwash after to reduce
the acidic effect on your teeth. My dentist
says you should use mouthwash, not toothpaste.
Ginger tea is also effective. However, don't
buy grocery store tea bags. Buy real ginger
root, peel it, and boil a slice of it in a
pot for at least 5 minutes.
Honey and whole wheat can also help headaches.
Last, but not least, is cardio exercise. Walking
on a treadmill isn't enough. I do 30 minutes
on an eliptical cross trainer at least 3 times
per week.
If you doctor prescribes you a pain killer
for you headaches DO NOT take them more
than twice per month. If you do, you risk
getting rebound headaches. What Migraine
painkillers do is shrink the blood vessels
in your brain so that your headache goes
away. But if you take them too often, the
blood vessels will bounce back, and become
swollen again.
RAYMOND
CHANDLER IS THE MASTER August 9, 2007; Farewell My Lovely, published
in 1940, is the second in a series of nine
novels by Raymond Chandler. Phillip Marlowe,
the private eye, finds himself in the wrong
place at the wrong time when an ex-con, Moose
Malloy, gets out of jail and goes in search
of his former flame. Marlowe is witness to
Malloy committing another murder, and a member
of the police department asks Marlowe if he
can help find the fugitive. The wisecracking
private eye gets beat up by crooked crops,
gangsters, and other criminals in his search
for Malloy.
Raymond
Chandler is considered by many scholars
to be one of the finest mystery authors
of the 20th century. Chandler's novels belong
to the school of hard-boiled detective fiction
with a tough guy detective who drinks hard
liquor on the job and isn't afraid of anything
or anyone. The selfless invesigator, Marlowe,
is a tough as nails, but has the heart of
an angel. He continually risks his own life
to solve the cases he has been hired for.
One outstanding quality of Chandler's novels
his ability to create fresh and distinctive
characters with rich dialogue that leaps
right off the page.
DICK
TRACY SCREENPLAY August 7, 2007;
I have searched the internet for the original
screenplay to the Dick Tracy film starring
Madonna and Warren Beatty. I don't think it
is available anywhere. However, I did buy
a copy of the novelization of the film in
a used bookstore. ISBN 0553285289. That appears
to be the best option if you want to read
the dialogue from the film. However, if you
have gotten your hands on the screenplay please
email me because I would love to read it.
I will give you a free copy of one of my books
in return for the favour!
THE
GRAYS July 10, 2007; If you like the X-Files,
you will probably enjoy Whitley Strieber's
newest novel, The Grays. This isn't a horror
novel that will chill you or frighten you.
Strieber presents many interesting arguments
as to why aliens might be among us, and why
they haven't yet revealed themselves to the
general population. Part of the backstory
is that in 1947 a UFO crashed in Roswell,
and three aliens survived, and were kept in
an underground prison by the US military.
One of these aliens has survived to this day.
What surprised me in this book is that I felt
empathy for the alien prisoner, instead of
revulsion.
THE
LEGEND OF LUCY KEYES
June 21/2007; I recently watched The Legend
of Lucy Keyes with Julie Delpy. For an
independent film, they they did an awesome
job creating spooky, ethereal ghost scenes.
Pretty impressive for a low-budget film. It's
based on a true story from 250 years ago--
a little girl named Lucy who went missing
in the woods in the eastern United States.
The legend is that the ghost of Lucy's mother
still wanders the woods to this day, crying
"Lucy, Lucy!" in search of her daughter.
The drama is impacting, and is just as good
of a film as An American Haunting, although
not quite as jolting.
THE
SWORD OF SHANNARA
June 21/2007; The Sword of Shannara by Terry
Brooks is a fantasy epic that will delight
both teens and adults. First published in
1977, it is one of the best-selling fantasy
novels of all time.
It is the epic tale of a half-elf, half-human
man who is summoned by a Druid to find the
legendary Sword of Shannara in order to stop
the Warlock Lord from conquering the Four
Lands. This novel was heavily influenced by
The Lord of the Rings with similar plot motifs
and character types. Terry
Brooks shines in his ability to write rich
detailed narration.
In
the spring of 2007 Warner Brothers optioned
Terry Brook's Shannara series of 14 novels
for a feature film franchise. It is rumoured
The Elfstones of Shannara will be the first
film.
BEYOND
THE INVASION OF THE BEE GIRLS
July 31/2006; a sequel to the cult film Invasion
of the Bee Girls was performed as a stageplay
in Seattle in 1998. It was called BEYOND THE
INVASION OF THE BEE GIRLS. The play was also
published in chapbook format by Rain City
Projects. I am interested in penning a sequel
myself, but I don't know how to obtain legal
permission to write it. Who owns the copyright
to the original film?
CONSTANTINE
2 COMING IN 2009
October 9/06; I've watched Constantine
four times. It has definite parallels
to The Matrix, but instead of an artificial
computer generated world that blinds people
from the truth, there is a hidden Universe
of angels and demons that only the spiritually
awakened can see. A word of warning! Don't
watch this film if you're squeamish about
seeing demonic images or an exorcism being
performed on a child.
What
sets Constantine apart from The
Matrix is its influence of hard-boiled
detective fiction with the chain-smoking,
hard-drinking anti-hero, John Constantine.
Although some accuse Keanu Reeves of being
a wooden actor, I'm a definite fan of Keanu
Reeves. He does what is does. As John Constantine,
he plays a kind of Clint Eastwood type character--
with a "Go ahead you demons, make my
day!" attitude. Rachel Weiz's performance
as an FBI agent grieving her sister's death
is performed with great pathos.
Constantine has the biggest anti-smoking
theme you will ever see in a movie, except
maybe The Insider with Russell Crowe.
If you want to see what smoking will do
to your body, take a close look at the state
of John Constantine's lungs in near the
end of film.
Constantine deserves to become a franchise.
THE
VALENTINE FLYNN SERIES
August 4/2006; My favourite author this summer
has been Robert Tralins. Not because he produces
works of literature that will one day be studied
by Universities, but because his books are
the most entertaining pulp novels I have ever
read. Even though they are pulp novels with
improbable plots, the level of diction and
vocabulary is suprisingly high.
Operation Boudoir, which he wrote
under the pseudonym, Sean O' Shea, is a thoroughly
enjoyable adventure and the best I have read
in the series so far. Operation Boudoir
was published in 1967 and is the 2nd book
in a series of 6 Valentine Flynn adventures.
The lead character, Valentine Flynn, is a
cross between Austin Powers, James Bond, and
Errol Flynn. I have also read The Topless
Kitties and What a Way to Go. I
am currently reading Invasion of the Nymphomaniacs.
The other 2 titles in the series are Win
with Sin and The Nymph Island Affair.
I hope the Valentine Flynn novels will be
adapted into a feature film one day! They
have been optioned for the film rights in
the past.
Robert Tralins (aka Bob Tralins) has written
250 books under a multitude of ghost names.
I wish I could find a complete list of all
his works, but I can't find anything in Google
or his official website.
Robert Tralins wrote a spy trilogy with a
female heroine. I recently read the first
book in this series called The Miss from
S.I.S. I definitely enjoyed it, but it
didn't have quite the same pizazz (or the
steamy scenes) that the Valentine Flynn series
has. The other two books in the S.I.S.
trilogy are The Ring a Ding UFOs and
The Chic Chick Spy.
IT'S TIME FOR A CHEERS REUNION OR MINI-SERIES!
Augst 17/ 2006; I've been watching season
1 of Cheers on DVD. This show is the best
romantic comedy ever made! The Sam Malone
/ Diane Chambers relationship is far and away
the best romance ever done on a sitcom.
Back in 2005 Kirstie Alley expressed a desire
to do a Cheers Reunion special. I think it's
time for either a Cheers Re-union, a Cheers
mini-series, or the launch of a new Cheers
series!
Bring back Cheers! None of the actors from
the show have full-time acting gigs. Have
a brand new cast and let the old cast members
make guest appearances or be part of the supporting
cast. Let Sam and Diane finally get married.
INVASION
OF THE BEE GIRLS
August 14/2005; Invasion of the Bee Girls (aka
Graveyard Tramps) is one of my favourite sci-fi
films from the 1970s. It is a genre-bending film that
includes detective fiction elements, feminist overtones,
and mild horror schlock. The feminist elements may
not be obvious to the casual viewer, but the plot
element of housewives turning into bee girls, and
then doing a fatal number on the men of the city truly
makes it a girl-power movie!
Released in 1973, it was written by Nicholas Meyer
who directed Star Trek 2: The Wrath of Kahn.
Roger Ebert has given it 3 stars. The acting and dialogue
is consistently good unlike many low-budget B-movies
of that era.
MAN
ON THE MOON
June 3/06; One of my favourite Jim Carrey films is
the under-rated biopic Man on The Moon. Jim
Carrey plays the late Andy Kaufman of Taxi
fame. I've been reading the actual screenplay this
week and I think Andy's alter-ego Tony Clifton is
one of the funniest characters ever created. I bust
my gut laughing at every scene with him in it. He's
rude, obnoxious, and proud of it. I hope there will
be big screen Tony Clifton biopic on day. He's a total
riot!
THE
GODFATHER PART 4
May 31/06; It is time that Godfather 4 be made. Andy
Garcia wants to do it. Al Pacino would sign on if
there is an excellent script. Sofia Coppola is becoming
a fine director and could direct it. It has been 16
years since the last chapter. It's time for another
installment! Even though Michael Corleone died at
the end of Part 3, his death was many years after
the main events in the film, so another story with
his character can still be told. If Godfather 4 never
gets made, at least Andy Garcia and Al Pacino are
going to both be in Ocean's Thirteen which
starts filming this summer. If the movie is a hit
I predict we will see Pacino and Garcia back for Godfather
part 4.
DIRTY
HARRY 6 RUMOR MILL
May 11/06; Moviehole.net
is reporting that a screenplay is ready to go for
Dirty Harry 6. The question is will Clint Eastwood
sign on? He has signed on to do vocals for the forthcoming
Dirty Harry Video Game. But will Clint Eastwood sign
on for one last outing in the theaters as Harry? Personally,
I hope he does. I love films about cops who take the
law into their own hands when the law won't do anything
about the criminals.
If they ever do a remake of Dirty Harry, Hugh
Jackman is the perfect choice! If you watch the original
film the resemblance between the younger Clint Eastwood
and Hugh Jackman today is uncanny.
A
SEQUEL TO ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND?
May 6/06; I abosolutely love this film. I can't say
enough about it. I've seen it four times now and I
don't think I'll ever get bored of it. I've also read
the screenplay. It's amazing how many details in the
film are different than the final shooting script.
The changes that the actors or director made were
genius and made it much better than the final screenplay
version. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
is the story of two everyday ordinary people
who keep falling in love with each other, even after
their memories of each other have been erased. Every
time I watch it I clue in to some new detail in the
script. I think it is fair to call this a stream of
consciousness film with all the loops shifts backwards
and forwards in time. I've never seen a film like
quite like it before. If you are reading this and
know a comparable film please e-mail me! Jim Carrey
plays a role that is the complete opposite of the
rubber-face characters in his many hit comedies. I
know Jim Carrey hates doing sequels, but I really
hope he will consider doing a sequel to this wonderful
gem. Does anyone know if there are any sequel plans
for this brilliant film?
HOW
TO DRAIN YOUR SINUSES
April 13/06; It's messy, sloppy, and gross to watch,
but it works. For over 5 years I had severe sinus
pain. Every night in the middle of the night I had
to take an Advil Sinus to clear my sinus passages.
But over a year ago I discovered a solution and I
no longer use Advil Sinus. What I do is fill a glass
with warm to hot water, 1/4 tsp salt, and 1/4 tsp
of baking soda. Then I dip a spoon in the glass, lean
my head back and pour it down one nostril. Then I
lean forward and blow it down the sink. I repeat this
4 to 6 times in each nostril. It will totally clean
out your plugged sinuses. Do it every morning and
night before going to bed. You won't believe the disgusting
gunk that will come out. Yes, it's messy and sloppy,
but it works. Your sinus pain will quickly be relieved!
January
2006; My book "Let Me Tell You About Jerks"
is part of a course called "Intro to Language
& Literature - ENG 101" at Holyoke Community
College in Holyoke, Massachusetts, USA. More than
30 college students will be studying it.
SUE
GRAFTON: F IS FOR FUGITIVE
September 28/2005; If you are a fan of Raymond Chandler
then Sue Grafton is an author you must read. Kinsey
Millhone, the female private eye in her series of
books, is like a grandaughter of Phillip Marlowe,
the detective in Chander's novels.
The writing in F is for Fugitive is clear and
concise and rich in diction. Kinsey Millhone has a
wry sense of humour and if you pay careful attention
you will pick up on the excellent observations she
makes regarding old-age obesity and religious hypocrisy.
September
2005; My new book "Let Me Tell You About Jerks"
was included in a course called "Intro to Language
& Literature - ENG 101" at Holyoke Community
College in Holyoke, Massachusetts, USA. More than
60 college students studied it.
August
2005; I've been corresponding this summer with Robert
Tralins who is one of the writers for the TV
show, Beyond Belief, which airs on the Sci-Fi channel.
THE
BIONIC WOMAN & THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN
August 13/2005; I have always felt a personal connection
to Jamie Sommers (Lindsay Wagner) because when I was
in Grade 3 and 4 a lot of my classmates made fun of
me and called me "Lindsay Wagner" because
my last name is Lindsay.
Unfortunately, no word yet on when The Six Million
Dollar Man or The Bionic Woman will be released on
DVD. Do you remember the quote from the intro to the
show? "We can rebuild him. We have the technology.
We have the capability to make the world's first Bionic
man. Steve Austin will be that man. Better than he
was before. Better . . . stronger . . . faster."
WHEN
WILL THE WORLD RUN OUT OF OIL?
August 13/2005; The Road Warrior presents a
vision of the future where gasoline is such a rare
commodity that people will fight to the death to possess
it. I think the Max Max films give us a chilling
reminder of something that will certainly happen in
our future-- a crisis over oil and gas.
When is our Planet going to run out of oil? I've heard
it said we may only have 100 years of oil left. What
happens after that? Perhaps the western nations will
have developed electric-powered cars by then, but
what about the poorer countries? What will happen
to the World Economy when the World runs out of oil?
Will plastic become more valuable than gold?
AUSTIN
POWERS 4: FOR YOUR THIGHS ONLY
July 01/2005; I finally watched Austin Powers Goldmember.
Yes, definitely crude in spots, and way too much bathroom
humour, but overall just as good as The Spy Who
Shagged Me. There were some extremely funny laugh
out loud scenes. I want this series to continue! In
fact, I would probably watch 10 Austin Powers movies
if they made them.
You have to give Mike Myers credit for being a great
actor. Most actors play almost the same character
in every film they are in. Mike Myers played 4 completely
different roles in Goldmember. And the scene with
Tom Cruise, Kevin Spacey, and Danny Devito was a laugh
out loud riot. I can't believe Myers got them all
to do it.
Accoording to Moviehole.net Mike Myers has been working
on a script for Austin Powers 4: For Your Thighs Only.
Apparently all 3 heroines will return and it will
be set in the 1980s. I hope Austin Powers is a franchise
that will live on for decades just like Star Trek
and James Bond.
Personally, I think to continue the franchise, they
should focus more on Dr. Evil. Perhaps a prequel of
how Dr. Evil rose to power. I love it when he says,
"Why am I surrounded by so many frikkin idiots?"
or "Come on people, throw me a bone here!"
or "Scott, you're just not evil enough."
July
2005; An earlier version of my screenplay "Two
Demons and a Dead Man"
was performed on July 1st and 2nd at Mt. Hood Community
College in Gresham, Oregon. There were two performances.
It was performed under the title, "Journey
to Hell."
WILLIAM SHATNER PLAYING CAPTAIN KIRK FOR MEN IN BLACK
3?
June 04/2005; There is a story today at Moviehole.net
that plans are underway for Men in Black 3. If Will
Smith doesn't want to do it, or Tommy Lee Jones doesn't
want to do it, William Shatner would be the perfect
choice.
Bring
Back Kirk! Bring Him Back Captain Kirk As A Man
in Black, or if not, Paramount should cast William
Shatner in the Men In Black franchise!
BRING
BACK KINDRED THE EMBRACED
June 3/2005; I recently finished watching the 8-episode
series on DVD and I must say I was impressed. A melding
of Godfather type gangster movies with the Vampire
genre. It is truly sad that Mark Frankel who played
Julien Luna died in a motorcycle accident. He was
a great actor who reminded me of a young Al Pacino.
Despite being a little too gory and bloody at times
for my personal tastes it was a fascinating show with
a rich cast of characters. I hope one day it might
be reimagined in a feature film.
April
2005; My funny stream of consciousness essay called
"Let me tell you about Jerks" was part
of a course called "Intro to Language &
Literature - ENG 101" at Holyoke Community
College in Holyoke, Massachusetts, USA.
I
HAVE CREATED A FEMBOT
March 26/2005; I am fascinated by fembots. Who isn't?
What is a fembot? A fembot is a beautiful female
robot, sometimes mindless, sometimes intelligent,
but usually programmed to do something evil. I suppose
fembots are rooted in the femme-fatale character
motif-- the "deadly woman" who brings
a good man down.
In Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me, Austin
Power's wife is revealed to be a fembot. I believe
there were also fembots in the Six Million Dollar
Man TV series and maybe even the Bionic Woman series
as well. A fembot appeared in a Classic Spiderman
Cartoon I watched recently with my kids.
November
2004; My poem ZERO was recently published in STRUGGLE
"A magazine of proletarian revolutionary literature"
Many thanks to the editor and publisher Tim Hall!
November
2004; Many thanks to Nick Petersen at 92.5 FM "The
X" for playing Revolution
from our album Scream
Justice.
Links:
Trek Web A
great site with daily news on all things Star Trek
related.
Movie
Hole An awesome site
from Australia with daily news on future Hollywood
movies.
Dark
Horizons Daily news on future
Hollywood movies esp sci-fi and genre films.
Please
add a link to:
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